Fantastic Turkeys And Where To Find Them – Slaughtered In Time For Christmas

Piss poor plotting, basic characterisation principles gone for a Burton, too much scripting emphasis to appeasing the woke, the Johnny Depp Yokey-Cokey whilst unhinged attention whore Erza Miller got away with near murder off-set because he played the rainbow card, thinking special effects and CGI could compensate for a lack of structure to the overall story arc.

The real mystery is that it made it to the third movie at all.

Put your money on Warner Brothers now telling J K Rowling either she agrees to a Harry Potter TV series on HBO with a much reduced amount of control on her part, or any future new business ventures with the corporation are at an end, it will only be ‘legacy’ produce that will be considered hereafter. No Ilvermorny, no nothing.

Rowling’s fond of stealing other people’s stories – pity she never stole any of Aesop’s or she might have learned something in the process, particularly Perry Number 87 and 721 …